Hello Females and Males Whom occupy the same general realm of existence as I, I have Come to you to tell you an amazing story of my youth:
I used to frequent an establishment by the name of ‘Santiago’s Den,’
Within the establishment lied a fundamental key towards understanding our existence, A local Newspaper called the establishment ‘Quite the place if you need Uranium 235,’ This report was not far from describing the atmosphere of the location, Once during a visit of mine, a man stopped me to inquire about the location of the Uranium 235, In which i replied with bemused contempt and utter confusion, This displeased the man, he then tried to heist me of my currency and possessions, In which i responded by violently ripping out his heart and consuming it, Santiago’s den erupted into a scene of violence, confusion and public nudity, Meanwhile, the outside of the establishment was surrounded by the local Schutzstaffel, Whom got out their grade a firearms, planning to clear the den of violent activities,
The armed men entered, shooting all those in which they encountered,
A Local Newspaper called the situation ‘A Nightmare for Yellow Cake Uranium Addicts,’ Santiago, the owner of the establishment, was arrested for kidnapping Senior Citizens, The Establishment then was closed, but reopened 3 years later, due to much public interest, Santiago finally payed off his bail and opened ‘Santiago’s Den, Mark 2,’ A fitting name,
A Local Newspaper commented saying ‘This rubs my nipples in the right ways, Please and thank You,’ This plunged the local populace into a state of anticipation for the new and improved establishment, Many flocked in human herds to the Den, the establishment did rub their nipples in Right Ways, Causing many to call the establishment, ‘The 2nd Best thing to occur to Human Civilization;’ The First being the discovery of the much sought after uranium 235 and its illicit distribution, I however, did not have my nipples rubbed in sufficient ways by the new found establishment,
So Whilst walking to my residence, I tried to ponder to derail my vast disappointment, Whilst roaming the urban streets and thinking deeply, I started to ask myself questions, I wondered about a question that had plagued our collective conscious for a long time,
‘What is a Bullfrog’s worst fathomable nightmare?’
This Inquiry lead me down a path of studying this topic obsessively for 42 years, and after my wifes death, A fourth world war, and my 28 children committing mass suicide, Most likely due to their fathers mass neglect towards them and obsession over his seemingly useless inquiry, I have finally come to a coherent conclusion that the answer to my question,
‘What is a Bullfrog’s worst fathomable nightmare?’ is indeed nothing, for that bullfrogs fail to experience nightmares. . .
A Local Newspaper called my discovery ‘An event that has resonated with us all and finally closed in on our most pondered question that we wondered since we were hunters and gatherers...’
I truly hope this tale has rubbed your nipples in the right ways and inspired you to join the military.
credits
from The Yolo Boyz Make Noyz Vol. 1,
released February 14, 2016
Kirk Bevlin - Drums
Rocey Diver - Bass
Cole R. Feprulo - Guitar
Goei Mqarsz - Percussion
Klaus Balthasar Tablehe - Guitar / Vocals
Ian. - Mixing & Mastering
The Yolo Boyz are a noise rock band from Janesville, MN. Formed in November of 2014 when Cole R. Feprulo jammed with Klaus
Balthasar Tablehe, The Yolo Boyz are the inventors of their unique genre Feedback Rock and hope to become the ultimate expressway to yr. skull. Enjoy all of our endeavors....more
A raucous adventure through noise, no wave, off-kilter DIY prog, and the absurdist side of post-punk from Pagan Athletes. Bandcamp New & Notable Jun 13, 2023
You’d expect an album titled “Velociraptor” to be heavy and this doesn’t disappoint, as it’s jam-packed with serrated noise & feedback. Bandcamp New & Notable Apr 22, 2023
The racket avant-rock/noise group White Suns make is queasy and challenging, but with a taut sense of dynamics and composition. Bandcamp New & Notable Jan 19, 2021
A meditation on grief and loss, this experimental collaboration between Luna Honey and Norman Westberg is both haunting and touching. Bandcamp New & Notable Jun 20, 2023
St Celfer returns with tracks culled from a series of live shows, each one a showcase for his inventive experimentalism. Bandcamp New & Notable Jun 26, 2023